Wednesday Afternoon... (revised)

TODAY was a bad day! Somehow we were talking about Katie & he said we have alot to fix. He also said we have alot of bad blood & years of repair that need to be made. He said that she told him recently what happened that night 13 years ago, almost exactly like it happened. (I feel like someone helped this story or at least refreshed her memory & I think it was his mother or sister.) He said that he keeps telling her that someday she might need me, like if he's out of town, etc. She told him that she wouldn't call me for a doggone thing & would wait for him to come back in town. He just keeps talking about Katie & I repairing things & getting back on track. He asked me to take her to pick up her contacts on Thursday evening. Now after he tells me all this ~ why would I want to? and why does he want us to have such a good relationship? ~ oh yeah, b/c I was the best mom she's ever had.

Then, he goes on that he's getting divorced & he doesn't need this affecting her anymore than what it is (everything that is affecting her is b/c of him & him dragging her in the middle of it or letting her put her 3 cents worth in). HELLO!!! ~ does he care about me??!! Of coarse all this conversation is going on at work & I'm crying. He tries to tell me that he can't believe I don't know that he's serious about a divorce & he knew that I was thinking that things were going to be fixed & we were going to stay together. He said that he's done & he's been done for about 2 years!!! I told him that wasn't true that we have had some good times over the last 2 years. He said that he was trying really hard to make it work. I said there have been times that I tried really hard too and that is what a marriage is... you have to work at it & sometimes harder than others. I had to leave work for about an hour & a half to calm down... I was too upset to stay there. I went to pick up his laptop & then went to hide at my friend's tax/bookkeeing office while I talked to my prayer partner. No one knew where I was but her & my friend. I was able to calm down enough to go back to work & finish the day. Just a few minutes after I got back to work - the lady at the church down the road where we buy our bulk food each month called me. I had asked her to pray for our family when I went to get our food 2-Saturdays ago. She said she would & then she also said that she would call me in a couple of days to check on me. Well she didn't call me for a week & a half. She said that she had been thinking about me all day since early in the morning. She asked how my day was & I said not good at all - as a matter of fact it's been bad. She said now I know why I can't get you out of my mind. She asked if she could pray for me right now - I said sure! It was powerful & of coarse it was very strong & meaningful. I felt all this was signs from God to keep on keeping on! God is working & this is why they are SO miserable... esp. Scott w-me.